Odd man out
The power of different
If you want to do something important you need to be comfortable with being the ‘odd man out’. Few things courageous or important happen in the middle of the herd. What are the challenges and opportunities of being the odd man out?
What will you discover when you start to think, do and act differently than the ‘great mass of men’. Two things will happen. First, you will be alone and naked on your path – initially no one will follow you. Second, the herd will turn on you and you will be cast out. They will try at first through cajoling to get you to stop acting differently. Eventually admonishments will turn to threats and eventually they will cut you out.
I found a recent example of this dynamic while I was trying to get to the rice cooker in my kitchen. Rachel, who has been coaching me on nutrition had warned me it would happen. I had asked her how I could take the recent healthy gains I had made in my diet and make them sustainable.
She said, “You’re just going to have to get used to the fact that you’re going to be the odd man out.”
There I was, hovering in the entrance to the kitchen, but I couldn’t get to the rice cooker because my family had come home and they were concocting some celebratory dish of chicken and cream cheese that I wasn’t at all interested in eating, while I wanted to steam some rice and veggies to stay on track.
My wife got angry with me. Why couldn’t I just eat what everyone else was eating? Why was I being so difficult? I was the odd man out.
…
As I thought about what Rachel said to me this week I realized that it applied more broadly to our lives than just being the diet pariah. In everything you do you’ll have the choice to ‘go along’ or to be the odd man out. The problem is that acting differently, thinking differently – being different is necessary for anyone who really wants to succeed.
If you stay on the inside of the herd, doing only what is allowed, advised and accepted you will accomplish little, and what you do accomplish will benefit someone else. If you fully subjugate yourself to the herd you not only do a disservice to yourself but to the herd by hiding your light, your difference and your potential from the world. It’s a waste.
Another consideration that we have realized with recent economic upheavals is that when the herd gets herded into the slaughter house it will be too late for you to break out.
We are an evolving species. Your work life and your community are evolving organisms. To stop evolving is to eventually regress and cease. A mechanism is required to move the herd in order to keep it alive. Don’t you owe it to your herd to help them move and survive? Shouldn’t that be part of your value add?
Of course there are outsiders that are just plain dangerous. They need to be shoved out and isolated from society because they are different in an evil way. I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about people who understand the herd but are willing to break from it, not to cause harm, but to demonstrate unique value.
I propose that leaders have found a way to be outside the herd but to be part of it at the same time. They do this by setting the direction and in many cases making hard decisions against the status quo.
Like most things, it’s a spectrum that runs from the 100% herd-like individuals that cannot fend for themselves and need to be led to consummate outsiders who can’t work with the herd. Much of where you fall has to do with your personality type – but I think you can learn to break some of your assumptions and push the edges no matter where you fall.
It is possible to innovate and lead from the inside and it’s your duty. How can you do this very unnatural thing? The herd does not like change. When the herd senses change it will react to protect itself. The protectors of ‘the way it has always been done’ will become anti-bodies and you will be the virus.
How do you create insight and change in the organization without triggering the immune response? One way is to position yourself as a change agent. Known change agents are part of the herd. They have declared themselves as change agents they are out in the open and not a direct threat.
Once you have declared yourself a change agent you get a free pass to come up with all sorts of whacky, counter-cultural ideas. It is your job to chase the sacred cows and question the dogma.
The nuance to this role is that you have to have support from or at least alignment with the organization’s power. Otherwise you are just a trouble maker and an anarchist. You have to make the power understand that it is your unique value to bring an outsider’s insight to them. You will not be one of the corporate drone yes-men. They need to understand and see this value.
Leaders and the powerful in organizations like to have access to these types of individuals and insights because it gives them the check and balance they need to make forward looking decisions. Leaders like this resource around because they can leverage it to implement change without taking a direct role or risk themselves. As the internal-outsider you are a prized commodity for the leadership team.
In order to truly play this role you need to internalize the feeling that you do not need the herd. You need to operate from a position of independence of thought and action and a position of emotional detachment. When the game plays out you may find yourself outside the herd or trampled underfoot. Understand that, be ok with it and own it.
Change only happens when there is an odd man out willing to walk away from the herd.
This is your power.
- Position yourself as an outsider and a change agent.
- Align your change with power.
- Be willing to walk away.
What are some practical steps?
– Look for projects that have low urgency but create high value and execute them – “Hey look at this cost benefit analysis I had done on the partnering scenario!”
– Declare yourself a change agent – “I like to think of myself as a change agent.”
– Ask change questions – “If we could have anything we wanted what would this look like?”
– Be emotionally detached – “Hey, I’m going to do the right thing no matter what. I can always find another job, I’m here because I believe in the potential.”
– Earn the right to be a change agent – Study, read and listen to everything, especially things outside of the herd’s viewpoint. Write up these ideas and share them freely.
You cannot change your results unless you can change your actions. You cannot change your actions without risking the immune response from the herd.